A Minx’s Guide to Christmas Shopping (Ho ho ho)

Season’s best to all my Minxes out there, and welcome to the sparkly wonder that is the Christmas Shopping season.

“Oh no it isn’t!”

Oh yes, it is! It’s that time of the year again, and with just a few weeks to go to get all your sexy shopping done, I thought I’d lend a helping hand, with my very own Minxy guide to sexy Christmas shopping.

Rampant Rabbits.

So, I just typed sex toys into Google, and the first of 77,600,000 hits was the good old fashioned Bunny – one of my favourites.
Rabbit vibrators come in many different styles and colours. They vary in price, but generally start at anything from around £20 – £25, depending on the supplier, model and size. If you go for a branded name, prepare to spend a little bit more (be mindful you’re paying for the name of the supplier – they’re all made in the same factories).

I found this one on Amazon – I quite like the fact it looks a bit like a Darlek. Popularised during the late 90s / early 00s due to exposure on Sex and the City, Rabbits have become a sex toy of choice. They are lots of fun, and a good investment. I know of someone who enjoyed it so much, she burned out her rabbot within a year. 🙂

Rabbit vibrator

Sexy lingerie

Sexy lingerie

This is a great present, but there are a a few things to bear in mind before you buy something.

First of all, get the size right. There is NOTHING more likely to get you the cold shoulder/a short sharp knee in the nads than getting something too small or WORSE, too big. Also, it’s quite insulting to have to use a saleswoman as a point of reference, e.g. “She’s thinner than YOU but her tits are more like HER size”. Make sure you know your partners dress size AND bra size before you go shopping.

Second, make sure that you have the same idea of what’s sexy. When I worked in the shop, time and time again I saw guys hovering near the PVC nurse outfits, while their girlfriends or wives turned white with suppressed boredom / horror / rage. Equally, I also saw girls looking at lacy silky wisps of naughtiness, that made their partners blush and rush out to check the car. Be honest with each other about what you each find sexy.

You don’t HAVE to spend a fortune on sexy lingerie, but if you CAN afford it, quality pieces are going to earn you some serious brownie points. I have a weakness for a decent pair of Cuban heeled stockings – not cheap compared to regular tights, or normal stockings, but they are well worth it for how they make me feel.

Cuban heeled stockings

Sexy Santa Fancy Dress

I love fancy dress, and Christmas is a great excuse to get your baubles out. And what better way than to be inspired by Mr and Mrs Claus. This is a great time of year to let your hair down and give in to festival finery, especially if red’s your colour. And Ho Ho Holy Jingle Bells, some of those fur trimmed numbers are naughty!

Sexy Mrs Santa

Sexy Santa

You could also opt for slightly less serious Christmas fancy dress with some festive g-strings…..

Reindeer G-string

Christmas themed nipple tassels…

Chirstmas pudding nipple tassels

Or just go for something in seasonal colours….

Sexy red

Pole dancing lessons /Pole dancing kit

More and more people are taking up pole dancing as a way of keeping fit these days. There are now plenty of studios offering lessons, many people are investing in their own pole to practice at home. You can spend a lot of money on kitting yourself up, but you can easily pick up a decent pole, which doesn’t require ceiling fittings, for about £200. If you’re looking for a brand, I’ve seen the X-Pole sets and they were pretty decent. As for classes – like I said, there are loads around. I’ve been to a few in Cardiff, and they were great fun, and would be a fab pressie! Who knows…you could be the next World Pole Champion!

Pole dancing

Along the same theme….

Burlesque lessons

Burlesque is having a fabulous come back, and with Vintage and retro styles being more popular than ever, there are plenty of people offering lessons to help you shake your tail feather. Why not treat your someone special, with a brilliant gift, so they can learn to primp, peel, pose and set pulses racing, by learning to how to do a good old fashioned striptease. Think Dita, Betty and Gypsy Rose Lee, and get some sass for your ass!

Dita Martini Glass

And Finally…

If you’re looking for a comedy pressie, I would highly recommend this offering by Firebox. For Biology/PSE teachers looking for visual help, your sick best friend, or the person who’s got everything….

GIANT FLUFFY STDs!

Fluffy STDs

These little critters are based on their real life microscopic counterparts, and how can you get mad at someone for giving you Herpes or the Clap when it’s so gosh darned adorable?? If you’re going to give someone a sexually transmitted disease this Christmas, make sure it’s one of these guys. All the cool kids have them, and as Firebox recommends – ” You gotta catch them all!”

Good luck with that shopping!

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littlewelshminx

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About littlewelshminx

I'm a Welsh girl in my 30s, living and working in south Wales. I like reading, writing, watching films (especially things that make me laugh) hanging out with friends, going to bars to drink and dance playing guitar (badly) listening to lots of different types of music (opera to dance to bluegrass to rock) going to the theatre, and I've recently started swimming. I have 2 degrees, and have had lots and lots of different jobs, including working as a barmaid, waitress, KP, shop assistant, admin assistant, events, sales, PR, marketing....writing suits me best. I will be writing about sex from as many angles as possible - from personal experience, through academia, history, geography, culture, myth, legend, fact and fiction. What is sexy? What turns us on? What do we really think and feel about sex? If you like what you read, please follow me, and pass it on :)
This entry was posted in burlesque, christmas, Christmas shopping, Cuban heeled stockings, Giant fluffy STDS, lingerie, pole dancing, rampant rabbits, sex toys, Sexy Christmas Fancy dress, sexy christmas presents, Sexy Mrs Santa, Sexy Santa, STDS and tagged . Bookmark the permalink.

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