An old friend of mine and I were recently chatting about super heroes, and how over the last 10 years the comic book / super hero world has exploded onto the mainstream scene of cinema. I asked him who was his favourite sexy super-heroine / damsel/hero girlfriend, and was met by a stunned silence, then a mass of enthusiastic responses. Apparently it was a very cool question, and I don’t think he had been asked before.
Therefore, today’s blog is my first collaborative piece, with contributions from my friend, who wishes to be known as Ultimate GMX. So here’s a rough introduction guide to comic book and super hero beauties. Before anyone says why didn’t you include Rogue, Storm, poison Ivy – I’ll do another one soon!:
The Girls of GEN 13
Starting with a slightly more obscure choice, Gen 13 were basically Xmen for perverts. Sarah Rainmaker on the left had the ability to control the weather, was bi-sexual, then lesbian, and part Apache. Caitlin Fairchild in the middle was basically superstrong, and transformed from a skinny geeky girl with NO curves into a statuesque Amazon (the transformation shreds her clothes) and Roxanne “Freefall” Spaulding one on the right was the grungy chick, obsessed with men who could control gravity. According the Ultimate GMX, the only reason he remembers this from years ago is because basically every issue they would get captured and always stripped off for no apparent reason.
Mystique may be the ultimate fuck buddy.A fictional character associated with the Marvel Comics’ franchise X-Men, she first appeared in Ms. Marvel #16 She’s dangerous, it’s no secret she loves sex (she’s bedded good guys and bad) and best of all… she has the ability to shape shift into any person she wants. So as long as she’s game you could sleep with a different girl every night. Here’s a direct quote from Ultimate GMX about this trait “I’ll take Jessica Alba tonight please…. actually Jessica Alba but with Christina Hendrick’s tits. Every guy’s dream.” Seeing as how she’s supposed to be over 100 years old, she’s also the Cougar of the comic book girls.
Hailing from Themyscira, an island populated by warrior girls, Wonder Woman a.k.a Diana was sculpted from clay by her mother and brought to life by the gods. She is supposed to be the most beautiful woman in the DC universe with the looks of Aphrodite, the Greek goddess of love, beauty, pleasure and procreation. She is gifted with a wide range of superhuman powers and superior combat and battle skills. She also possesses an arsenal of weapons, including the Lasso of Truth, a pair of indestructible bracelets, a tiara which serves as a projectile, and, in some stories, an invisible airplane. Her depiction as a heroine fighting for justice, love, peace, and sexual equality has also led to Wonder Woman being widely considered a feminist icon.
Ultimate GMX also wanted me to point out that due to the fact there are no men on Themyscira, she has to be a virgin and must have one HELL of an itch to scratch. Also don’t piss her off she has abilities close to superman and has trained all her life as a warrior. So if anyone does get lucky with her, they better call her back, unless they fancied being tied up by the Lasso of Truth. Kinky.
Supergirl (a.k.a Kara Zor-El/Linda Lee) is like her cousin superman, and one of the strongest characters in the DC universe her cousin Superman. While superman left Krypton as a baby and arrived on earth and grew up, Supergirl had a harder journey.She left Krypton at the same time but as a teenager. Her journey to earth took years and she was kept in suspended animation. When she finally arrived, superman had grown up and she hadn’t aged at all. Her youth, beauty and innocence combined with a teasing outfit make Supergirl the stuff of fan boy dreams.
Catwoman a.k.a Selina Kyle, is a smoking hot sex kitten bad girl. She constantly evades Batman by exploiting his only weakness…… women. She seems to be the only one who has this effect on him. With a huge rack, dressed in skin tight leather and constantly crawling on all fours, she oozes sex appeal. Oh and she has a whip. Catwoman is slutty in her attitude. She’s got the body and uses it to her advantage, and why not? Ultimate GMX is of the opinion that Ann Hathaway did NOT do this character justice. I agree. Michelle Pfeiffer all the way.
And last but not least, Mary Jane, or MJ. Now, Spiderman is very special to me. Back in the day, I was introduced to the wonder of the comic book geekery world by a seriously devoted and passionate fan boy, and he started with Spiderman. Thanks to him, I’ve had a soft spot for Peter Parker and Mary Jane ever since. Mary Jane is the uber hot girl next door. She has no powers, but is incredibly patient. In the comics she knew from day 1 that Peter Parker was Spider-man, but never revealed it to him or anyone else. Only years later when he fell for her and decided it was time he revealed his secret did she reply ‘I know!’ She has stuck by him through thick and thin when she was with him or not. She also gives hopes to the masses of nerds out here that a geek can get the super hot girl of their dreams.
For me, the ultimate Mary Jane/Peter Parker incarnation is the 2002 Tobey Maguire/Kirsten Dunst film version. Maybe there’s some teenage nostalgia there, or maybe it’s the upside down kiss scene. Even though she’s not technically a lady in lycra, she’ll always be the sexiest comic book girl to me.
Much love to all my fellow Geeks out there, and special minxy thanks for Ultimate GMX for his help and time. Cheers babe.